June 24, 2012

Common Lies Women Tell Men


Before I start proper, I just wanna say I love this photo to the max!
Yeah, I've spent quite some time drawing the floral designs with black eyeliner. Definitely not an easy feat.
I love how this photo turns out! Don't you love it too?
Ahem! Enough with it and let's get started!


Disclaimer
 What I'm stating below does not simply represent the whole of testosterone-counterparts.



So, it is always said that women are unfathomable and it is darn true! We are mysterious and confusing in our ways. It is almost like Mission-Impossible to fully understand what's going through between our ears. While we strive to be candid, honest and truthful, we do lie at times (OMG!). Who doesn't? I can be sure you guys lie too. Most of the time, these lies from your little angels are little white lies.  Half-truths told to keep the peace and to protect her own feelings or yours.


And so *takes a deep breathe*, I'm presenting to you "Common Lies Women Tell Men".


"I'm fine"

I guess this is the single most common lie told by women to men. If you had truly believe in that, perhaps you deserve a good kick in your nuts. We are emotional creatures and do get upset! This is the code for "I'm fine, you won't be", we say one thing but mean another.


It's up to you to figure if you want to step into our minefield or run to the hills. Usually your best bet is listening.


"I won't get mad if you say I look fat/ in this. Honestly, I just want your opinion."

This is almost always a trap. It usually goes something like this; a woman will tell her boyfriend to be honest about the jeans that doubles as sausage encasing for her ass.


Whatever you do, lie!  Women like to get compliments --- which is what she's indirectly fishing for in this situation. She's lying for sure, and woman or not, who wants to be called fat?


However, if you feel that there is a need to save her from public embarrassment (because of her not-so-flattering outfit), you might want to tell her the truth as gently as possible. Something like "Honey, you look great with your make-up and hair done, but I feel that the outfit does not compliment your great look/top." or "Baby, this looks good but I prefer you in another outfit. We would match greatly as a couple with that outfit!'.


 "It's okay if you look at other women/you forgot (the important dates). I won't get mad."

Ah ha! Don't you think you're getting off that easily. This lie is one of the most frequently used in relationships. Typically, women who have been hurt by men in their lives, often inadvertently use this phrase as an emotional defense. For example, if a guy forgets his girlfriend's birthday, calls her by his ex's name or commits any of the other minor screwups that most men do on a daily basis. Forgetting important events is like a terrorist attack on her heart. Women can't just let it go. There's always a subtle, disembodied fear that it could happen again.


Instead of admitting that she;s actually quite hurt by his relatively minor offense, a woman will halfheartedly pretend that she doesn't care at all. In reality, she does care, very much so, but doesn't want to look too anal-retentive or bitchy about it, so she puts up the flimsiest of facades to indicate otherwise.


This lie is extremely easy to pick up as women barely bother to hide their irritation in this situation. Excessive eye rolling, mean tones and passive-aggressive behavior in general are dead giveaways. You better learn to pick up on it.


Save your ass and to cut yourself some slack on headaches later on by calling her on her real feelings and discussing why she's angry. Or! Just keep your god damn eyes on your angels when they already had theirs fixed on you and make an effort to remember important dates (set reminders, no excuses).


"I'm cool with you going to a strip club."

This is actually a brilliant subterfuge passed down by great women since Helen of Troy. The woman gives the man just enough room to do something completely ridiculous and then uses her subsequent rage run amok for months, without repercussions.


Do not ever believe in this!
I repeat "DO NOT EVER BELIEVE IN THIS"!


"I'm on my way/I'll be ready in a minute."

If she rings or texts to tell you that she is 'on her way', chances are she is not on her way. She might still be trying on an outfit. She might be taking it off again. She might be trying on the outfit she first tried on 20 minutes ago. Whatever it is, she is categorically not 'on her way'. 

"I'll be ready in a minute" is one of a same kind. If, before you leave the house to go on a date, you had to shower, shave half of your body, slather yourself in moisturizer/sunblock, put on several layers of makeup (not to even mention rectifying makeup mistakes), straighten or curl your hair, getting a massive headache to pick out the perfect outfit that makes you look sophisticated/sexy/cute, it would take you a long time to get ready, too. So, wait.


"Oh! This was cheap! I got it on a sale!"
Now now now! Men, we just love buying stuffs whether a not it is a necessity or that thing just look-so-darn-cute-and-pretty. Surely you have noticed that your girlfriend has at least 2 cupboards full of clothes, countless sticks of eyeliner (all of them are in black), countless lipsticks in different shades (although she only wear one particular shade most of the times), you name it.

It is counter-intuitive to suggest "saving" than 'spending" money. But as lies go, it's not such a bad one. At least she's bothering to lie. A worst indication of the state of your relationship would be a brazen disregard for the shopping addiction that will eventually cost your credit rating, your house and your sanity.


Or maybe it is to deny the notion of vanity, when what the motivation might have been was simply, "Wow, my [attribute] looks great in this, I have to have it."

I'm not sure about it but I feel that when a woman has got a real cheap good deal for her purchases, there's no way she would keep mum about it till you have noticed her purchases. Instead she will start blabbing about it non-stop the moment she got her hands on them.





That's much about it. Probably, I will be doing on a post "Common Lies Men Tell Women".
Adios!

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